About Noob Gains

Kyle Hoffman is the founder of Noob Gains, the top online resource for new lifters to learn the most effective muscle-building methods to get the fastest results.

He understands the struggles and awesome benefits of being a “noob” and knows the right methods for quick progress.


About Noob Gains (Kyle)

Three Reasons You Should Not Be Here

Hey, I’m Kyle.

I thought it might be fun to keep writing this about page in the third person like I’m being interviewed by the evening news… but you know I’m writing all that stuff about myself anyway, right?

So, after feeding his ego for a little bit and stating what this site is about, Kyle decided to finish writing the rest of his About page in his own words so he didn’t sound like a douche.

Anyway… here’s some basic stuff about me.

I have a wife and two dogs… one named Vader and the other named Olive.

(Surprisingly, I’m not as much of a Star Wars nut as I’d have you think, but the name “Vader” is just awesome for a black pug.)

That being said, this information probably doesn’t help you decide…

Can This Guy Really Help Me?

Well, for most guys coming to my site… the answer is probably “no.”

Here’s Why:

1. I can’t make you look like “insert name here”

One of the hottest trends to hit the fitness world in recent years have been the “all access” diet and training programs of… well… anyone people drool over…

  • Hollywood actors
  • Fitness models
  • Professional bodybuilders
  • Superhero idols

I get it.

It’s one of the things that pulled me into the industry years ago (remember the movie 300?)

I thought all I had to do was follow a set of exercises and eat the foods on some guy’s website and I’d look like my favorite Spartan warrior.

Well, that didn’t happen like that.

I mean, I do have the body I’ve always wanted now, but it took good training, a strategic diet, and a strong commitment to show up every day.

Plus, I hate to burst your bubble, but anybody (even me) who relies on the fitness of their body to make a living… especially Hollywood stars… will use any tool available to make sure the public always sees a near-perfect set of abs… every time.

This includes steroids, surgeries, and camera tricks.

Now, I’m not saying that I can’t help you to look like a shredded, more muscular version of yourself… because I probably can.

But if you’re expecting to be a clone of someone else (especially someone who appears on screen wearing a cape), I’m not your guy.

2. If you don’t want to go on a diet, you’re not going to like my stuff.

Everybody and their mother is going to try to sell you the greatest gym hacks and workouts you’ve ever seen.

Now, those are all great in the short term…

…but if you don’t nail down a good diet, there aren’t enough crunches in the world that will actually give you a six pack.

You’ll never have the body you really want if you rely on quick fixes and training gimmicks.

Instead you’ll have the body of a slightly-enthusiastic gym junkie, who looks like everybody else at your gym.

Are you OK with that?

3. If all you’re looking for is a list of supplements, pills, or 24-hour hacks, I don’t want to help you.

Here’s the point that I’m trying to make…

I could help you with these things, but I won’t.

I have the ability, but I’m gonna pass.


It’s because every time I hear a guy ask me (as their first question) “Hey, what’s the easiest way…” or “What supplements should I take…” all I hear is “Even though my body doesn’t look the way I want, I’m not willing to put in the work to change it.”

Look, getting the muscular and shredded body that you want can be a hard process, but…

Once you know the system and have it dialed into your lifestyle, it’s exactly like you imagine.

You can have a lean set of abs year round, be strong in and out of the weight room, and feast on satisfying meals that include some of your favorite foods.

But that takes time to learn, adapt, and develop new habits that might be outside of your comfort zone.

Are you still with me? Good.

Here’s What You Can Expect with Me

  1. Actionable tactics and strategies to build some quick muscle and make lean gains.
  2. Complete programs for long term results.

The actionable tactics are free and can be found in my blog posts, videos, and podcasts.

Basically, if you like my quick tips and tactics, you’re gonna like my full programs.

Makes sense, right?

And going in that order will let me know if you’re willing to put in the effort needed to take that average body and …make some gains.

How Do I Know if Your Stuff is Any Good

Well, I think it’s time for me to give you more of a common “biographical” explanation of my experience.

Years ago, I used to be a complete “noob” with dreams of having a shredded, muscular body of a hollywood celebrity.

I’m pretty sure I bought one of those generic hollywood body programs with a training program and special diet that was supposed to make me look like a friggin’ superhero in only a few short weeks.

So, what happened?

Well, even though the program I bought was probably pretty good at the time… I didn’t put in enough effort for anything to actually happen.

First of all, I was hell-bent on working out using this crappy, plastic bench and weight set in my apartment.

Who needs the gym? I had all the weight I needed right in the comfort of my own home.

(All 135 lbs of it… pathetic.)

Second, I decided that paying attention to what I ate wasn’t all that important and as long as I felt like I was eating a lot… everything would turn out great.

The results… practically nothing happened.

I got “toned,” and my body came out with this weird, blobby consistency that pretty much looked like everyone else.

And as obvious as it appears to you right now why things didn’t work out, it took me YEARS before I finally got my shit together and learned what it actually took to build muscle and get lean.

Finally, when the day came where I took off my shirt at the pool and I noticed people sneaking a peek… I knew I was onto something.

Fast forward to day and I have a solid system for staying lean, looking pumped, and gorging on giant meals at my leasure… year round.

Here’s What I Will Help You With Specifically

What I really want to help you do…

I want to help you build muscle and get lean in a way that best fits with your lifestyle.

The hardest part about getting an awesome body you can be proud of is sticking with a system long enough to see results.

That’s why I believe in using methods that allow you to see the fastest progress, but keep you feeling healthy and full (dieting can be tough).

Here’s How I Suggest You Get Started

Read some of the blog posts here.

And when I have some special free materials you can sign up for… sign up for it.

(Like this list of beginner training programs)

Thanks for learning about me… now go make some gains!